My children cut their teeth on the Walt Disney video Too Smart for Strangers.While I don't think they lived in mortal fear of strangers, they learned to be cautious. Here are a few things we did to help protect them from at least some unknowns.
- Have a secret password. Children are not only at risk from people they don't know, but sometimes from people they trust but shouldn't. A casual acquaintance will probably not be sent to pick them up from school, but would they necessarily think of that? We had a system where there was a secret password known only to each child and the parents. If there was a need for someone besides mom or dad to pick them up, the friend or relative was told the secret password. They would have to use that word or phrase when they asked the child to get into a car with them; if they didn't have the password, the child was to remain at school and call mom or dad.
- Be alert. Children need to know that if they see a person loitering around the school who doesn't appear to belong there, they can and should report that to a teacher, staff member, or the school office. It might seem strange to them to see a 16 or 17 year old standing around outside the elementary school. Even if that person is innocently there, it is better to report it than to ignore it.
- Know the school's policies. Most schools send home a copy of their safe schools policy each year. Read it and know how the school will deal with emergencies. If the school is evacuated, where will the children be sent? What is the procedure for checking your child out from school?
- Advise your child to not be alone with a teacher. No matter how much they like or trust a teacher, they should not be alone in a room with him or her. If they need to talk with a teacher, have them take another student or a parent with them. It is better to avoid a situation which could be improper.
- Watch what they wear. I'm not talking about the latest styles here, or even about modesty (a topic for another day). What I am urging is that parents resist having their children wear clothes that might signal a gang affiliation. Some professional sports team clothing is even affiliated with some gangs. Kids can be stylish without having their clothing give off signals, intended or unintended, that might invite violence.
Get Involved
One of the more enlightening experiences I had was being chairman of the PTA safety committee one year. We worked to redesign the traffic flow around the school for school buses and for the large number of parents dropping off and picking up kids at school. We also met with the school resource officer for ideas on helping minimize student on student violence at the school. Consider volunteering to work with the school on the PTA or community council and make your voice heard.Conclusion
By encouraging that children follow a few simple safety rules, and by being more involved in your children's school behavior, concerned dads can make a difference in the likelihood of a child being hurt. Take the initiative and be a safety conscious father.
