Understanding the whys surrounding bad manners and knowing how it has become fashionable to behave rudely, what do we do about it in our own families? What are some specific steps we can take to teach proper social behavior?
Clean Up Our Own Acts. I know this is a tough one, but what message do we as fathers send with our own behavior? I have had to catch myself on more than one occasion as I experience a little road rage ("What a moron!") or frustration with an umpire or a referee at a sports game ("If that guy had one more eye, he'd be a cyclops!"). Or even worse, when I am preoccupied around the house and perhaps bump into a family member without apologizing, I send a message of disrespect. Even the liberal use of "pleases" and "thank yous" when asking my children to do something would go a long way.
Start Young. For those of us who have young children still at home, try reinforcing proper manners when the kids are still impressionable. When you have company at home, prime your child about what it takes to be a good host, and reinforce the positive behavior when they say please, thank you and act politely.
Apply the Golden Rule. When your child is treated insensitively by others in a social setting, ask them later how they felt and the impression that they had of the offending party. Maybe they were snubbed at a party, or someone interrupted their conversation with one of their own. Then remind them gently that we should think of others' feelings and that this would be a good reminder of how they should treat others.
