Equal Parenting Bike Trek This Summer
Sunday April 27, 2008
The annual Equal Parenting Bike Trek will begin this year on August 8 at the Michigan State Capitol and proceed for 758 miles to Washington, D.C. to show support for equal parenting laws. This is a great event and a way to raise awareness of the importance of fathers being co-parents and sharing joint custody after a divorce. The cyclists are all fathers with incredible reputations. There will also have an American Indian Organization present at the departure event performing their pow-wows of song and dance. Learn more about this event and show your support by participating, making a donation or sharing or blogging about this important opportunity to spread the word about equal parenting.
Comments
As a custodial father that once was a Non Custodial, I have donated some money to these guys to supporting them in their Trek. Along with that I hope to cheer them on as they come through Ohio. The horrendous attacks on non custodial fathers is unbelievable. When guys like this want to get the truth out, the main stream media ignore the facts of non custodial fathers and just report what the population believe. I have seen both sides to this issue, the discrimination I have felt from both is unbelievable. Because I divorced my wife I am called a dead beat dad automatically. When people find out I am a full time house husband and parent, I am called a dead beat dad. Fathers can not seem to get a fair shake in this Misandry Nation. So the guys on this Bike Trek have my support, financially, physically and emotionally.
RedWriters@aol.com
I can’t thank you enough for covering such a wonderful event that most mainstream media choose to ignore. These folks are doing a great job and deserve credit for their actions from all of us.
Anytime anyone keeps a child from a parent they are either a hero for protecting that child from a bad parent and should get a parade, or they are a child abuser for depriving that child of a good and loving parent that the child needs. And the onus should always, always be on proving the parent unfit.
Sapere Aude
Namaste
Love & Light
Peace
Thanks for the plug Wayne! We are thrilled to have the exposure your blog will bring us. Equal parenting has become the twenty-first century’s civil rights movemnet.
Thanks again!
words can not express my feelings to this unjust. i worked 3rd shift, my “ex” work during the days. it was me who was the care giver during their tenders years, 2 till 10, and to have a judge kick my in the lower area by telling me she’s the better parent. something very wrong with this picture. i don’t claim to be the brightest crayon in the box, but if this is all i can do get the words out about this great unjust. then so be it. i thank you Mr peterson for putting up with my bugging you for the past year. i feel honoroed in joining you all in this journey. i once heard a black man say that: we “divorced fathers” are the ROSA PARKS of the new millenium
Dear Wayne,
Thank you and About.com for covering this inspirational story. Pedaling 758 miles is not an easy thing, but it is a strong way of saying “you can always count on daddy”.
Please note that the departure date from the Lansing Capitol is August 7, 2008. Dance4Equality and also the massive CRISPE bus will be present. Hundres of cyclists, throughout many states, will also join for a few miles as a way of showing support.
Thank you AGAIN About.com and Wayne Parker for covering this and joining a large list of credible blpggers, such as Instapundit, Dr. Helen, Protein Wisdom and more, covering this story/event.
2007 EPBT Photo slideshow
http://www.flickr.com/photos/cycling4children/show/
2007 EPBT Media and Blog Coverage = TV, radio, newspaper interviews and more.
http://daddy.typepad.com/daddyblog/2007-equal-parenting-bike-trek.html
Many thanks for your BLOG and your article referencing the Pederson Bike Trek. As a Michigan father that wrongully had my four little children taken from my life, as fathers united, with God’s blessing we will overcome the disparate Judicial, FOC, and social workers controls! God Bless You!
Hi Wayne, I just ran across this article and wanted to take a moment to say, “THANK YOU” for posting the story.
I was fortunate enough to have met these brave men and their TEAM last year when they made thier initial trek from Lansing, Michigan all the way to Washington, DC. All 758 miles of it! Most of us who read of this story will never realize just how difficult this ride will be. Quite frankly, riding my bike 5 miles is a major undertaking.
Why are they doing this? There is no better reason, they are doing this for your children, my children, his children and her children. It is imperative that we take any and all legal measures available to us to shine a light on the injustices which are taking place all day every day in this countries *ANYTHING BUT FAMILY* courts. These injustices are separating loving parents from thier children for no reason other than the financial gain our States family court system.
It’s time for a change and I am proud to be associated with the bike trekkers and everyone else in this country who is finally taking a stand and DEMANDING a change.
Thank You,
Donald Tenn is…
Christopher, Leesha and Madison’s DADDY and
Member, F4J National Board of Directors
Member, UCRCoA National Board of Directors
California State Coordinator
Fathers-4-Justice/US
Families-4-Justice/US
United Civil Rights Councils of America
PO Box 276885
Sacramento, California 95827-6885
Office: (916) 838-6291 NEW: (916) 226-9226
Electronic Mail: donald@f4j.us
Web Site: http://www.fathers-4-justice.us
Web Site: http://unitedcivilrights.org
DEDICATED TO MADISON: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wWssKKIUu7g
MY MySpace: http://www.myspace.com/DonaldTenn
SKYPE ME: fathers-4-justice
The Fathers-4-Justice/Families-4-Justice SuperHeros are **KPOW** **BAM** **SMASH** NON-violently fighting for *TRUTH* *JUSTICE* *EQUALITY* in our family courts for BOTH Mothers and Fathers because EVERYBODY knows that our children want, need and deserve BOTH mothers and fathers as active participants in their lives. **2 parents are better than 1** **50/50** EQUAL Parenting.
JOIN OUR TEAM!!! Together Everyone Achieves More = TEAM
https://shop.fathers-4-justice.us/membership.html
Fathers-4-Justice is a 501(c)(3) NON-profit organization, your donations and membership may be tax deductible. We need your support in OUR campaign. Thank You!
Families-4-Justice is a 501(c)(4) NON-profit organization, your donations and membership may be tax deductible. We need your support in OUR campaign. Thank You!
Thank you for covering the 2008 Equal Parenting Bike Trek.
Parents everywhere need to rally behind this event. Upon the cyclists arrival in Washington DC they will be greeted by the attendees of the 2008 Family Preservation Festival taking place at the Lincoln Memorial on August 15, 16 and 17. August is going to be a turning point for fit parents who have been denied equal access to their children.
Mike Saxton
Thank you for your article about the Bike Trek! These fathers are doing something amazing for our kids by educating people about the corruption in family court. We need more supporters! Please let the world know.
Wayne, thank you for bringing the Bike Trek into the spotlight. These five men are going above and beyond to make known the plight of fathers and children being morally and illegally torn from each other’s lives. Right is right….it’s too bad the government is wrong. The laws “should” be for “We the people”. The outcry is getting louder….let’s make it a ROAR that can’t be ignored!
It is nice to see the Equal Parenting Bike Trek mentioned here. I applaud these strong brave Dads for doing this for their children. It’s just a shame they have to. Children Need Both Parents, always.
Just a quick note to say, THANKS for posting this story. I am certain that OUR children appreciate all that the bike trekkers are doing for them. I know I do!
Thank you Wayne for your article on the EQUAL PARENTING BIKE TREK. I too lost my rights to my children through the No-Fault, winner take all divorce industry. Stop the federal incentives for divorce and watch them be cut in half. Thanks again and hope to see another article when the BIKE TRECK hits Washington.
Equal parenting time is not the issue. The issue stems from parents inability to cooperate and work together in the best interest of their children. I am not exactely sure what the situation between Robert Penderson and his child’s mother is but I can guess they don’t get along or appear to agree on whats best for their child. Thats the issue and thats what does the most harm to children caught in the middle of their parents inability to agree. No change in law will ever stop this. The parents need to change their attitudes!
Many, many, thanks for shining a spotlight on a significant issue which the conventional media seems determined to ignore.
As the single male parent of a delightful daughter, I found absolutely no support from any social services organization. For them, everything seems to revolve around services only if I was female, despite the fact that my child was female. I was astonished that they could turn their backs on any help for my efforts at raising her simply because I was not a woman. Both males as well as females have a positive role to play in our families and in raising our children.
Thank you.
Wayne:
Thank you very, very much for highlighting the 2008 EPBT. This Trek is a mentally exhausting and physically draining task. Our five cyclists are training hard, and deserve everyone’s support and thank-you’s. Attention like this will make our movement’s mission of enlightening and educating the general public to the reality of Michigan and other states denying a child the love, care, guidance and nurturing of a fit, able, and willing parent. Michigan is paid to commit child abuse!! Thank you again for publicly sharing this event, and the plight of tens of thousands of children!
Wayne, thank you for covering this event! Both parents should be treated equally under the law.
Thank you very much, Wayne, for bringing the Equal Parenting Bike Trek into the spotlight at a time when the world needs oodles and oodles of such events, and such spotlights. All it can get!
As the previous commenter remarked, BOTH parents need to be treated equally under the law — a matter of fundamental equity and social justice. This is the real point at issue, which another commenter appears to have “missed”, for whatever reason.
As far Shelia’s comment about two parents getting along, when one parent is carved out of the life of their child, how can two parents ever co-parent effectively? The court system has created an adversarial relationship between two parents, where both sides benefit from trying to undermine the other. That’s why presumption of shared parenting is so important.
Both parents love their child and even though they may have different parenting styles, you can be assured that the child is loved and nurtured.
Parental alienation is any behavior by a parent, a child’s mother or father, whether conscious or unconscious, that could create alienation in the relationship between a child and the other parent. Parental alienation can be mild and temporary or extreme and ongoing. Most researchers believe that any alienation of a child against (the child’s) other parent is harmful to the child and to the target parent. Extreme, obsessive, and ongoing parental alienation can cause terrible psychological damage to children extending well into adulthood. Parental Alienation focuses on the alienating parents behaviour as opposed to the alienated parent’s and alienated children’s conditions.
An earlier comment has left me a bit unsettled. It is true that parents need to learn how to agree. But their are circumstances that are left out of a parents control. One is in the def. above. Parents love their children yet one parent is not allowed by the other parent to be involved in any way in their childs life because of the alienating parents hurt or anger. What hurts the child the most is that half of who they are becomes “erased” with lies and images of an unrealistic fantasy created by the AP. Then like most people would do we all at one point looked to the judical system to see that justice was not done for us. When we walk out of court we see another side there is no justice. This ride is to educate about EQUAL PARENTING. To have justice not because of bickering parents but to be able to still see your child and be the parent you were before the divorce/seperation.
I was that child, I know. With enough voices and events to bark up the tree for our judical system they will have to see that their postions in office will be effected. Laws and reform can hold parents accountable for taking a parent away a child. This could very well save children and let them know its ok to love daddy/mommy. Parents divorce each each other never in the decree did it say they willfully divorced their children
Thank you for this chance and as I speak for all children thank you Robert and Angela for going out and bringing this subject to life for all.
The courts are not to blame for the breakdown of a marriage. The marriage was probably in the ditch long before it reached the steps of the family court. Children suffer in broken homes every day. They suffer even after the parents divorce because nothing was probably ever done to tackle the core problem-the parents. The only answer is to make the parents accountable. If one parent is bent on destroying a child with hatred and animosity towards the other parent why would you want to share that child with them? Because the other parent claims to love them? If they loved them they wouldn’t be acting like that. Shared parenting, 50/50 or any court order will not stop such parents and give relief to the child caught in the middle. We must have a system that gets to the core of the conflict between the parents and helps them work through their issues. Parents should have no right to divorce if and until they can do so responsibly. If all that fails and someone is not willing to work in the best interest of their child, I would suggest for the stability and well being of the child the parent most likely to cooperate should have sole custody. The vindictive parent should only have supervised visitation to safeguard the children from their toxic ways. Children need mom and dad on the same page! You can’t raise healthy kids by court order. They need two fit loving parents and fit loving parents put their children first! Fighting parents=UNFIT!
Shelia,
You seem to be missing the point. The NCP is usually not that way because of bickering spouses, it is a result of the Family Courts wanting to make money off of the children. They do this by alienating one parent, so they can collect Federal IV-D funds, without those funds, our family courts could not live “high on the hog” and the only way for this to happen is to alienate one of the parents, even if both sides want 50/50 custody.
Dance4Equality is proud to participate in the advocacy for Equal Parenting and the upcoming Equal Parenting Bike Trek. I appreciate reading everyones comments and even those who comments reflect a misunderstanding of how courts negatively impact families through the current systems process. I acknowledge these comments because it only indicates the stronger need to educate and inform our communities of the importance of equal parenting legislation and change of focus in our biased family courts. Thank you for the coverage of this awesome event and adocacy of Equal Parenting.
Regina,
Just about every jurisdiction in this great land of ours promotes shared parenting. The problem is the parents don’t want or do not know how to share! The majority of divorced parents do co parent sucessfully after divorce. Unfortunately some can’t and those are the ones we need the system to work harder to fix in the best interest of the kids. Books have been written by people who realize there is a problem for these “high Conflict” parents in the hopes that they will pick up a copy and educate themselves as to the damage their behavior causes to their precious children. The courts do not interfere with parents that want to make their own parenting agreements. Every case first must go through mediation in the hope the parents can work out their own agreements and keep it out of the courts. Bitter fighting parents cost the taxpayer money. One study puts that figure at $112 billion dollars.
Shelia, you comment on the Pedersen (”Penderen”) case, apparently assigning equal blame to both parents, while acknowledging that you don’t know all of the facts.
I don’t know all of the facts either, but we need to allow that the facts are different in every case.
What I know is this. I’ve been on e-mail lists with Robert for years. He has always been polite and courteous on list. His only and clear expression of feelings has been for the love of his children and his wife Angela.
Custody disputes under the current legal system create a winner take all fight to the bitter end that virtually ensures any preexisting conflict between the parents will escalate rapidly.
“Although the details vary, every state’s law indicates that custody decisions are to be made according to the ‘best interests of the child.’ That rule of thumb sounds laudable, but it is so vague that the outcome of every case is unpredictable. The possibility of ‘winning’ in court, paired with the emotional dynamics of divorce, encourages parents to enter into custody disputes, which only increases conflict between them–and conflict is a major cause of lasting psychological damage to children of separating spouses.” Scientific American Mind, September, 2005.
It’s not accurate to say the present legal system is blameless with respect to exacerbating conflict. The system itself encourages conflict and psychological harm to the children.
It’s time to stop blaming parents and start making some positive changes that will help the children.
Comment 12/ Sheila your comment reeks of the systems diatribe. If one parent disagrees then the opposite parent suffers, as does the child/ren. That is not the answer to this problem. The courts should see that one parent continues to be combative and the Court should be the entity to penalize the combative party. But because the courts stand to make more money through the Federal Governments programs and attorney fees/court fees, by continuing the “battle” over the child, the courts favor the combative party, ultimately allowing the child to be abused even more. How is this “The Best Interest of the Child”? If the courts penalized the combative parent the “war” would end sooner because it would be counter productive to continue. If one parent can not agree on a fair and equal bases to parent the child, then that parent should have less time with the child on the grounds that the best interest of the child would be to place the child with the parent that wants to teach that child about more then just how to hate and hurt another person.
A custody dispute occurs when the parents can’t agree on whats best for their children or one parent may feel there is a significant matter, ie, domestic violence or some other matter that threatens the safety and well being of the children. Everyone in this great country of ours is entitled to be heard and ensure their children are placed in a safe stable enviorment. The system is not perfect but I am confident they do the best they can.
Red Writer,
I am glad you agree that vindictive parents should not have much contact with their children. This is exactely why dividing children 50/50 does not work unless the parents make it work! Children are not furniture or a record collection!
Sheila - I was the male victim of domestic violence. My children were secreted away from me by my EX spouse’s parents while my EX was in jail. I had to file a ex parte motion against my EX to return the children from where they were being hidden. After all of that the FOC ‘investigated’ and the family court still awarded my EX custody of my children despite her criminal background and negligent behaviour. I was the victim of a crime, I played by the rules, I cooperated with law enforcement, yet I was ordered by the court that ‘in the best interest of the children’ they should be placed with the mother. Sheila by your own standards and comments one would think I should have received custody while my EX served her time, attended her anger management counseling, etc. etc. This did not happen - why? Because the system is flawed and corrupt - the system is all how much $$ can they extort from the NCP, and it has nothing to do with the best interests of the children. Please everyone must realize this - support equal parenting and lets really think about the children. The laws must be changed!
Shelia,
Until you know all the facts, you should remain quiet. It is not the parents costing the taxpayers, it is the Courts. And NO, if a parent any type of public assistance, they have no choice in the matter of custody, they force a parent into the Friend of Court system in order to receive benefits, and then they are the ones who decide custody, and they do so in their favor so they can collect outrageous government funding. The courts are alienating parents and children, not the parents and certainly not the children.
Sheila,
50/50 shared parenting does make sense in the fact that the child at least will have the chance to make critical decisions on their own experience with both parents. That is not possible if the child is removed from a daily dose of either parent.
While we can not fix the parent that wants to destroy the child’s relationship with the other parent. We can offer the child that chance to find the truth. The current status quo of “Winner Take All” in custody removes one parent from the child significantly. The more time the State takes from one parent (the father) the more federal funding that State stands to collect. There is no “Best Interest of the Child in the current methods. The statement the best interest of the child is misleading deliberately, just because you paint beautiful flowers on an “Port a pot” does not mean that that port a pot smells any better. So is the fact about the current laws, both smell the same.
The innocent victims thrust into custody battles are being victimized by the misconception that the courts actually care about the children. The courts concern only goes as far as the federal funding permits.
At the beginning of a custody dispute both parents should be treated equally but this does not occur because the State would not be able to perpetuate a battle, thus fleecing the conflicting parties of all assests. What should occur is once the Courts identify the combative party, that parent should receive less and less of the child’s time.
When the 2 parties elect to seperate and divorce the previous contract, it should be a clean break. Why should one party be required to then financially support the other after that contract is broken? The child/ren would spent equal time with each, thus no money should be exchanged and used to control the child’s future. The federal funding and the child support order motivates these parties to continue to victimize the child. When the courts subtract time from the combative party, the true value of the love for that child will shine through, ending the conflict and sparing the child from witnessing the hurt that the conflict, ultimate, thrust on these poor, innocent children.
RedWriters@aol.com
Shelia - How can two parents get along when there is one malicious and vindictive parent trying to alienate the other parent from the child(ren)?
If Equal Custody was the norm, there wouldn’t be any room for parents to disagree about the custody of their kids.
The laws of our great country encourage people to live together in peace and security yet we all know too well that some people will not obey those laws and choose to murder, steal, abuse drugs etc. All these bad choices affect our society. Laws try to deter these behaviors but they can’t prevent someone ignoring the law. They can only give consequences. Family law gives parents the freedom to choose whats best for their children. Most states promote shared parenting and believe thats its in a child’s best interest to have both parents involved in their lives. Unfortunately some parents don’t choose this. For some there may be good cause not to choose to share as the other parent may be on drugs or some other activity that may put the kids at risk. These parents have a right to take those concerns to a judge. I would also like to point out that in most states if not all mothers and fathers are given equal consideration under the law. The law cannot discriminate based on gender.
Kenya,
I’m am pretty sure that much of the attitudes (maliciousness and vindictiveness) were going on during the marriage long before the family courts got involved.
Dear Mr Penderson,
It has come to my attention that you are copying and reposting my comments to various father’s rights groups without my permission and for the purpose of harrassment and to bully me because I do not totally agree with your agenda. I would appreciate it if you would please stop doing this. I have sent copies to Mr Parker of your posts to these yahoo groups. As free Americans we are all entitled to our opinions. I assure you my opinions are what I believe to be the best interest of children. If other people come to about.com and read them and wish to comment further they have that right but to copy my posts that are not intended nor have I given my permssion to be posted elsewhere is not right. Please stop doing this immediately. Thank you!
Robert, et al,
Congratulations on your heroic efforts to stay involved in you childrens lives despite a vindictive Mom and an unjust court system. Thanks for creating awareness that the courts are generating 100’s of thousands of orphaned children every year in te US alone. This can be solved with greating understanding of the value of parents in childrens lives. Some of the comments on this post confirm that there needs to be greater awareness of this devastating effect on families of divorced, unwed parents, Moms, Dads, and children.
Shelia either wants attention, has no clue to the truth or works for the family court system.
Mr. Parker thank you for taking up the support of the Equal Parenting Bike Trek to DC. It is really important to bring to the attention of all that the Family Courts and Divorce/Custody industry have failed our children. Shelia it is true that we have the right to speak our minds so why get upset when your thoughts are used to better educate others on the general ignorance of our society? Mr. Pedersen is doing you a favor by making your thoughts widely known and possibly helping others by encouraging them into action. The majority of custody cases are not settled in the best interest of the child but rather in the best interest of the industry. It is well documented that lawyers, judges and court employees pressure working parents, usually fathers, into accepting limited visitation rights. Most children are being harmed by these custody arraingments since studies have been completed and demonstrate that children need both parents to develop properly. A presumption of Joint Physical Custody law will require that the court and lawyers respect the rights of the child to be raised both of their fit, willing and able parents. This type of law will actually reduce the amount of conflict since parents and lawyers will know that making the case for sole-physical custody would be difficult unless their is clear and convincing evidence of unfitness.
Get Off The Bench at www.getyourjusticelive.com supports the Equal Parenting Bike Trek and the Upcoming Family Preservation Festival 2008 at www.dcrally2008.com. Thank you Wayne for putting this excellent piece at fatherhood.about.com.
My heart goes out for these comments. First I would like to share thatRobert dosent have a mean bone in his body. His goal is to educate!!
Second I feel like we have not done enough and still have a far way to go to educate the public. Sheila do you have custody of your children? Do you see them everyday? Have you arrested for false accusations of sexual/physical abuse?
The justice system failed me and my brothers. My mom begged and pleaded for us if there was a law in effect for equal parenting maybe my childhood would not of been the way it was. Full of pain and anguish. The courts didnt give us your thoughts of justice. My mother feared for her life and ours.
The courts knew the story and theactions they knew the logic but they said with the law the wayit is their hand were tied. In the best interest of the child, I know whats in the best interest for the child. I dont live in leave it to beaver land. You say most states want shared parenting if this is so then how come only 16 states got proclamated.
I will live, eat, sleep and breathe, to make a diffrence in this and this only proves more to me that people will never understand my childhood. Its like hearing again its just another bad divorce, It was more than that it was a life changing event that my mom couldn’t stop.
Darrick wrote: Shelia it is true that we have the right to speak our minds so why get upset when your thoughts are used to better educate others on the general ignorance of our society?
Dear Darrick,
Because I also have a right to decide where I want my comments posted and Mr Penderson did not respect that right. He could have asked me first. I do not believe he was trying to use my comments to educate anyone.
To Chrissy,
I am sorry you had a bad outcome. Did your dad abuse you? How do you think 50/50 custody would have changed that? Wouldn’t that have allowed you to be with the abusive parent 50% of the time? Do you think an abusive parent should be allowed anytime? I certainly don’t! Again I am sorry for the trouble your parent put you through. There are too many innocent children out there like yourself being abused by parents and step-parents.
Shelia,
You continually sound like the opposition to equal shared parent that truely believes the garbage the media force feeds you.
Single mothers are 73% more likely to abuse their children. Yet your assumption that a father abuses and a mother nurtures all the time repulses me.
I was swept into the custody courts because I no longer could condone the alchol, drugs, emotional and physical abuse reaped upon me and my children. I filed for divorce to save my children from the misery their mother daily created for them. At the time, in my ignorance I believed the courts would see the true “best Interest of my Children” was in my home with a parent that did not drink, do drugs, have a significant criminal record or chose to be unemployable. Yet to my shock and horror the courts removed me from their lives and insisted I pay $1700 a month in child support. On top of that the mother held our children hostage every other weekend from me until I agreed to pay her $100 extortion fee.
You have never seen such miserable children. You would not believe the relief just to spend a day with their father brought. In a 3 day weekend I got to watch my children go from miserable cynical old men and by the 3rd day they were happy laughing little boys. Only to know that they would be forced back into 2 weeks of drugs and men marching through their lives, only looking forward to a father that would rescue them, if only for 2 short days.
I begged I pleaded with the courts to see clear to the hurt and un-needed destruction in their lives for 4 yrs. Only to be scoffed at and accused of being a jealous ex husband even though I was the one that filed for divorce.
Ultimately she was the one that made the custody change, she was busted with 1200 lbs of drugs and guns. When I took emergency custody she was ordered to pay $89 a month. Eleven yrs later she has paid nothing and has never been penalized for not acting the mother her children desperately needed. She has refused to practice her visitation time with our youngest son of 16 for the past 4 yrs. What do you tell a young man that knows his mother hates him?
To this day, if she were to come to my home sober and asking to see her children, I would fall all over myself to make it happen. But for 4 yrs she did everything she could to make my life hell and destroy her children’s futures. It isn’t about me though, it is strictly and only about our sons and the perception they have of females and the world around them. So please keep your sactomonious trash to yourself until you are on the dirty end of the courts and it’s corruption. These Courts diliberately placed my children in danger and was charging me almost $2000 a month to watch my children go through a living hell. Only because it was collecting Federal Funding equal to the amount I was paying my ex to drink and drug each month with the money she was suppose to be using to provide her children with a decent life.
You have no clue of the real world, only what the media and the corrupt courts make you believe.
I know Dead Beats, I know they are real, but the other 98% of we fathers only want to provide and protect for our children and ignorance like yours only perpetuates the problem we face. Give Equal Parenting a chance before you sumarily decide your gender is always right. Discrimination comes in many forms, yours has a penis.
Red Writer,
I never assumed anything about fathers abusing their children so I don’t know where you got that from. I am sorry to hear how your kids suffered. Indeed, it sounds like the courts made a mistake but it seems you got that corrected. Good for you! I am sure you agree with me that 50/50 would surely not be in your children’s best interest with such a toxic mother. Imagine if you had to share your children with an unfit abusive parent 50% of the time? I am a bit perplexed when you say she has refused her visitation? Surely you would not want her to visit your impressionable 16 year old would you? Thank God she doesn’t visit! You tell your son his mother is sick and that its not anything to do with him! Pray that mother gets well! I wish you and your children the best!
Sheila’s ignorance has gone from being educational to annoying. Let’s focus our attention to this positive drive and message. This is how are children and families will really benefit! It is apparent that Sheila needs further understanding of Equal Parenting legislation and how it would impact our children and family courts.
I have my own story which my children suffer today…this is why I am so appreciative of Robert and Angela’s dedication and efforts as well as everyone else involved with the Equal Parenting movement!
(Parenthetically speaking, I cannot help but wonder if Shelia would classify herself as a feminist . . .?)
Shelia,
You are mistaken and read what I wrote with your discriminations fully in charge. I said I would GLADLY allow a 50/50 if she were able to be sober. But this isn’t about my case alone. I am a leader for the Parents Rights movement in Ohio. I hear and witness, daily how parents are automatically evicted from their children’s lives for no other reason then the fact they were born with a penis. The Misandry the family courts show is very obvious and you are percipitating it with your unwillingness to understand the bigger problem we are discussing.
I see no reason to continue this discussion with your through this forum. I apologize to Wayne for this, he was enlightened enough to share this information with the larger world, however with that you invite ignorance to over run it.
If you or anyone else feels brave enough to argue this issue with me you are welcome to try. email me at RedWriters@aol.com, but know if you allow your ignorance to morph into stupidity I can and will share your lunacy with others. So any email sent to me is not protected from any ridiculous claims of privacy online.
Here in Michigan, the Friend of the Court recommends joint physical custody in about 20% of the cases, and the outcome in the courts is similar. (http://michbar.org/journal/pdf/pdf4article329.pdf)
Even if all gender bias were eliminated, it would still result in children being all but cut off from one of their parents in 80% of the cases. Given the extensive research over the years demonstrating the adverse consequences suffered by children who do not have a relationship with both parents, it’s difficult to understand how any reasonable person could defend this system.
The joint parenting legislation in Michigan provides an exception for unfit parents.
Fit, willing and able parents need to be able to play meaningful role in their children’s lives. The current system denies one of the parents this opportunity in the vast majority of cases.
Again, the current system provides incentives for parents to engage in an all out winner take all battle that increases the conflict level between the parents. There has to be a better solution.
Shelia,
There is nothing wrong with asking others to respond to you comment. When you type your opinion it becomes available to public. There is nothing wrong with debating the issues. If debating issues feels like harrassment to you I would suggest that you not comment. I am not quite sure as to why you picked my name when Wayne’s article states nothing of it. There are six cyclist - not just Robert Pedersen. Why do you hang out in Yahoo groups associated with fathers? Wayne wrote an excellent article and people are #1 thanking him and #2 telling readers why they do or do not support shared parenting. Anything more is in your imagination.
The 2008 Bike Trek will prove to be an extremely notable catalyst in the fight for equal parenting…The effort the these men who will make this Trek is phenomenal. I commend the efforts of Robert Pedersen who has taken this and made it a personal goal to raise the consciousness of America about the plight of Fathers nationwide…KEEP GOING FELLAS
Shelia, if you post your words upon the internet, you should do so with the foreknowledge that others just possibly MIGHT spread those words around and talk about them - even, at times, less than charitably. It’s a risk that you assume, and you should simply learn to take it into account and roll with it. I mean, that’s the way we roll in the information age, eh? “Information wants to be free”, and all of that. Well, I don’t know if it “wants” to be free, but it certainly is notorious for escaping like Houdini, isn’t it? But anyway, if you can’t quite handle the tricky communication ecology of the Info Age, then I would recommend you limit your activities to the village ‘party line’ circa 1930.
Mr.Parker,
Thanks for bringing to light the Equal Parenting Bike Trek on your Blog.The fathers who are trekking sure do deserve to be recognized.They are representing many of us fathers who have been eliminated from our children’s lives by court judges,DCF/CPS,state case workers who have their own agenda,money.The amount of money they receive from federal funds under SS Title IV et.al.is based on the amount of single parent house holds they can create and the number of children they remove from loving parent(s).The creation of single parent house holds have become epidemic in America.
Thanks to Robert,Rob and the whole Bike Trek Team they will show the world that children need both parents regardless if their parents are married ,separated or divorced.This is in the best interest of all children.
Don’t let Shelia hijack this thread. The Equal Parenting movement is a breath of fresh air and a worthy cause. If the current system was any good, the movement would not be needed and would not exist. The Bike Trek deserves the increasing publicity it is receiving. Good on you, guys!
I would like to thank all the people involved in bringing this wonderful event to life. This is not just a problem in America but throughout the world.
I had myself thought that this was a problem for parents to sort out until I worked with single parents in the community. Now, I see the difficulties in sharing children between parents. There is too much going on and harm being done to parents and children when one has more control over the other. I see now that it is for the Government’s benefit to create revenue that continues the existence of one parent having control. Re: child support.
This is a big political fight but one that is absolutely necessary for the well being of children.
I look forward to the day other countries get involved. Thank-you again.
Auckland Single Parents Trust, New Zealand.
You sound very angry and paranoid Mr Penderson. I do hope you and your ex can work out your issues and come together for the sake of your children. They really need everyone to get on the same page and do whats in their best interest. Good luck with your kids they will need it.
The fact that you attack my husband only, despite many telling you to checkout makes you suspect. His comment is #48 and many people after that responded direclty to you. My husband’s response on comment 48 is nothing close to being “angry”. My husband is an amazing father and husband who has gained the respect of many because of his actions to help children of divorce.
I am glad to say that my husband gets along just fine with his ex-wife and that they have a near 50/50 physical child custody agreement. We are not doing this for his children, but for ALL children who are denied the fundamental right to be loved, guided, nurtured and educated by both fit and willing parents.
I would ask that everyone NOT respond to Shelia (not real name)anymore. Clearly many disagree with her but apparently she only has issues with my husband. As Paul stated lets not let her hijack and alter the positive things that are occuring from this event of SIX (not just one) cyclists.
It is great events like this will get the word out. With experts agreeing that sole custody is a form of child abuse, and 92% of custody awards being sole custody, it is clear that our family court judges are the result of the vast majority of child abuse today. Only when you understand the hidden matching federal funds for chiild support can you understand why a system intentionally destroy children and familiesby the millions.
I have no idea who Sheila is, but I do believe she has an issue with RP that is one sided only.
Let’s not turn focus on anything but positive and true reasons of the bike trek. Reform in family court is very necessary. Judge’s are not properly handling cases.
One of the cycling fathers is presently a candidate for circuit court judge in family court in Kent County, Michigan. Family Court across the nation needs reform badly.
If people would just take an active part in being part of the solution to the problem, we would be much further ahead.
Children and families are the basis of our society and nation. If the family is destroyed, so is the nation.
It is absolutely wonderful that this site is promoting the Bike Trek and the Family Preservation Rally in Washington DC next August. Thank you Wayne Parker.
I am a grandmother, the children are precious!
You sound very angry and paranoid as well Mrs Penderson. It was your husband that perceived me as some threat to his agenda, went on the offence, stole my post from this website, posted it to other websites without permission and gathered a small hoard of angry people to come over here and harrass me. Not everyone is going to agree with your position on whats best for children of divorce Mrs Penderson. Attacking people that don’t totally agree with you only destroys your credibility. Being angry, engaging in name calling and character assination will not serve you well nor will it draw people’s support for your cause.
Most states do NOT promote shared parenting. Only the 7 states noted below. Promoting and informing are two very different things.
Joint Physical Custody by Case Law:
Georgia
Requiring a trial court to first consider joint physical custody:
Kentucky
States with some kind of presumption or preference for approximately equal physical custody, maximum time with parents, or similar language:
Alaska, Iowa, Kansas, Oklahoma, & Wisconsin
I am very thankful that Wayne Parker wrote this article. Over 100 blogs have already covered this inspirational story of six fathers pedaling over 700 miles for children.
LOL .. I see Shelia the Case Worker hasn’t left this thread yet … lol
The more she shows her ignorance the more people will understand the stupidity of the current custody laws, thus costing Shelia, and other men haters, their jobs with the Child Support Enforcement Brigade. So I pity Shelia and the demise of a high paying job she would never had but for the blood of children and families she strives to destroy.
I personally say let her rant and rave, her true colors have shown and I am not talking about the gray hair. All this is doing for her is highlighting the wringles that pound of makeup she wears can no longer hide…. lol
She and others like her can not allow the thought of EQUAL shared parenting because this would strike them in the chained leather wallet, the job they currently have and the child support checks they greedily glutch to. Sad when parents only see their child as their own personal meal ticket. The true feminists are embarrassed by this crowd of old crows that can not stomach EQUAL Rights and demand to crush all men for fear they are out classed. The Parents Rights group has taken up the standard of Equality for Feminism and Shelia and her comrades are doing everything they can to rip it apart because they are inferior humans that can not hold their own when it is on level ground.
Shelia, never come to a battle of wits unarmed, of course you have not learned the basics about Society, how could you understand wits? Never mind … LOL
With Love,
“The Red Writer”
i saw an interesting bumber sticker today. i will make a sign for to use at our next rally…….
“HEY DUMB ASS, IT’S CALLED PARENTING, NOT GUNS”
I just wanted to drop a quick thanks to Wayne Parker and About.com. What a wonderful thing Rob and company is doing for this world of moddled greed. It’s a shame that we have people in this country who’se number 1 agenda is the dollar. What about the children? Keep up the EXCELLENT work!!!!!!!!!!!
http://www.kidsneedbothparents.org/index.html
I support this Bike Trek and hope it gets some things done in the court systems and DHS in all states. My friend is a father and is being denied the right to talk to his son or see him by his sons mother. He is paying child support but nobody cares that he doesn’t get to have any contact with him. But it is not only divorced fathers that are getting the run around. It is fathers also that had a child out of wedlock that are being messed with also. Hopefully this will help all fathers that are denied there rights. I may be a woman but I can see the fathers point of view. I’ve seen my friend go through so much pain in the last 4 years. Laws need to be changed. So thank you for helping us out.
“The law cannot discriminate based on gender.”
Perhaps the laws themselves do not discriminate based on gender, but the people implimenting the law in Michigan most certainly do. There is undeniable statistical evidence the courts and the FOC in Michigan have engaged in widespread systematic gender discrimination for many years. (http://michbar.org/journal/pdf/pdf4article329.pdf)
As you can see, fathers are awarded sole custody in about 10% of the cases, joint physical custody is awarded in about 20% of the cases, and mothers are awarded custody in about 70% of the cases.
Who really believes it’s best for children to be effectively separated from one parent in 80% of the cases?
Who really believes that a judge (typically with no education concerning child development whatsoever) can effectively make major life decisions for a child he/she has never met? (Based on a few statements in court that are often false)
The first step in reducing conflict between the parents is to get rid of the winner take all incentives that encourage parents to engage in all-out, knock-down legal fights to the bitter end.
In many cases, the parents who are pushing conflict are actually acting rationally to a large extent because they correctly perceive that they will be rewarded for generating conflict.
These incentives throw fuel on the fire of conflict that is consuming what’s left of our families.
You are right Jeff some things need to change. You must admit though when parents file for divorce thats a red flag that leaves many questions unanswered. There may be circumstances that will place children in harms way. So unless the parents are agreeable I doubt seriously you will ever have a system that doesn’t allow parents to bring their concerns for their child to a judge to decide. Even if 50/50 were written into law (and I seriously doubt it ever will be) that will not take away a parent’s right to challenge it based on the best interest of the child. Personally I believe that because of whack job parents, some good parents get railroaded in the mix. Tarred with the same brush so to speak. There are too many kids out there being abused by the very people that are supposed to protect them.
http://www.uptoparents.org/
EXCELLENT Comment Jeff!!
Thank you for all of the positive support of this event. All six cyclists and the chase vehicle crew are excited about the growing support for this event.
#12 Sheila
Sheila,
Please, for the sake of sanity, consider your words- “I don’t know the situation between Robert Pederson and his child’s mother…But, I am sure it is the result of two parents not getting along”
So applying simple logic (called sanity earlier by me), you insist that facts do not matter only your predetermined conclusion and that applys to all facts in every situation! In the science of literary interpretation, that is called isogesis. In simple speak, it is called putting the cart before the horse. In law, it is called judicial bias!
Hmmph! Judicial bias! You are employing the same predetermined conclusion to the fact set so that you can arrive at your desired outcome, no differently than the courts’ egregious behavior in custody determinations that the Bike Trek seeks to expose! You have only aligned yourself with the very corruption that we seek to end!
The courts have an agenda which is hidden behind their proclaimed Best Interest of the Child laws. The agenda is Title IV-D monies. The courts accomplish acquisition of these federal monies by creating a non-custodial parent in divorce. Thus, no non-custodial parent, no federal Title IV-D monies! Does this mean that every child should be adjudicated jointly parented in every situation? No! But, the question of a child’s best interest is lost in the courts’ pecuniary interst in Title IV-D monies!
Let’s return to our logic lesson! Applying the following logical analysis. Applying a predetermined conclusion to the facts (whether known or unknown) to create an outcome, presumes a pecuniary interst in custody determinations. Since you have applied your predetermined conclusion to Robert Pederson narrowly speaking, and to all non-custodial parents broadly speaking, you Sheila, have a bias towards the achievment of the outcome! Please post your bias- Self interest (previously called pecuniary interest), in your desire that children remain exclusively in sole custodial enviornments when clearly, virtually every child has two parents!
Sorry Randall I do not ascribe to your government “out to get you” conspiracy theory. Call Reverend Wright with that one.
Sheila,
I must say, it is you, not Robert Pederson who has delusional issues.
Robert has never done anything that I have seen or heard about that was anything but positive in appearance or purpose (except maybe fight for equal parenting, which you seem to feel is a demonic action).
I certainly hope you are not discouraged or driven to any negative actions when equal parenting does in fact become the accepted norm, even though it might cost you and many of your friends high paying FOC jobs (which according to Michigan’s
Prop-2 2006 are jobs largely held in violation of law - as FOC does not hire on a gender neutral basis)
Sheela, perhaps you will explain who this Rob “Penderson” person is..?
Anyway, I will go now and post your words on my blog. Do I have your permission?
Ooops, too late! I already did it! Darn!!!
I’m a recent mens and fathers rights activist and blog mostly on Glennsacks.com, but want to take a moment to thank you sir for you’re article.
Sheila, you stated you don’t know the situation or the whole story about Mr. Pederson. just one question thats comes to my mind and wont go away is: why would you make a comment on something you don’t know anything about?
P.s. every wonder why stories like this never make it to those blabbering anti men shows like OPRAH and DR. PHIL
we (divorced fathers)are the ROSA PARKS of the 21st century
Faher’s Rights and children’s Rights to their Fathers is the actual issue. Empirical studies have determined that Father’s are critical to their chidlren’s development, that Fathers, the planters, of life determine the Y and X chromosome of children, that the majority of children, in America, are raised by single mothers, that mothers as a whole are not offering the totality of parenting that children deserve: the future of America walks behind us. Misandry is sociopathic, it is time for good men and good women to oppose sociopathic meopia and demand legislation, court action, and each others support of Fathers.